Thursday, 4 December 2014

Lucy (2014)

So I never really got the chance to watch Lucy in the theaters, because of a combination of not having a ride and a lack of cash (story of my life). But I remember being excited for its release, the trailer looked good and the previews were fair. And it basically follows the same idea as Limitless, which in all honesty, was a blast and I loved it. So I got the opportunity to watch Lucy last night, and let's just say, my day could have gone waaaaaay better if I chose to watch Tropic Thunder for the millionth time as opposed to this shit-fest.

So, the story is about Lucy (obviously), who's tricked by her boyfriend into becoming a drug mule for a Korean mob boss (Triads?). So they plant the drugs into her abdomen and send her off, but the drugs eventually leak into her body, giving her the ability to utilize more than 10% of her brain and thus the ability to become superhuman.

Let me start by crushing your hopes children, this myth that a human being only uses 10% of their brain is total utter bullshit. It's science man, you can't argue with SCIENCE (Breaking Bad reference). Now that we got that out of the way, let's move on. I have never realised how much of a bad actress Scarlett Johansson is until I watched Lucy, like I don't see talent there. I mean she's a sex symbol, that's it, not a sex symbol that can act like Angelina Jolie. She fails as an actress just like Hitler failed when he tried to invade the Soviet Union.

She's really pretty but she just can't act
Another thing that pissed me off was the direction this movie was going in. *SPOILER ALERT* It went too over-the-top, I mean what's it supposed to convey to us (let's assume that this myth is a fact)? That if we reach 100%  of our cerebral capacity, we just turn into this giant Daedric looking supercomputer and release a flash drive then disappear*SPOILERS END HERE*. Going back to Limitless, I mean that movie too was over the top, but it had appeal. It engaged the audience and it had a twisty-ish plot. Limitless was a "realistic" version of movies that are based on the "10% of the brain myth", whereas Lucy was just fuckin' weird. Lucy is a prime example in which the direction of the movie was literally just forward, and not in a good way. No subplots, no emotion, and just to top it off, an abrupt ending that would literally make you want to throw your TV from a fuckin' airplane.

Anyways, I'm losing brain cells just talking about this shit-fest. So let me cut to the chase, do not watch Lucy, because I swear to god you'll hate yourself for it. If you want a movie that explores the same idea as Lucy, watch Limitless, and trust me, you WILL thank me.

"Ignorance brings chaos, not knowledge"

Ahmed Almatrook

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